Benihime
by Burning Frost
Summary: They took my manhood, my strength and the love of my life. They made me into what I am. A warrior, a fighter an avenger... There is no justice, only suffering, and I am the blade of vengeance... Ranma locked fic.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N**

The age old concept of Ranma getting his curse locked and sent to a new dimension via his enemies… with one hell of a twist.

The universe Ranma is sent to is one of my own making.

*~*~*~*~*

_Benihime_

*~*~*~*~*

Oh Susana

*~*~*~*~*

I got a lot of reasons to be angry.

A lot of reasons.

And it ain't those sissy, pansy reasons I got back when I was in Nerima.

I remember back then. Always bitchin bout my curse and my fiancées. Never knew how good I had it. Took it for granted. Sure there were things that I didn't like; but ain't nothing perfect anyway. Shoulda just kept my mouth shut and married Akane. I liked her enough, and I know I woulda treated her right. Ryouga was right. I was always a weakling and a coward.

I got a lot of reasons to be angry.

But strangely enough he ain't one of them. It was Ryouga who challenged me. I shoulda known something was off when I saw him there. He's never on time. Ever. I just thought it was something new. Taunted him, called him P-chan and one "Ranma prepare to die!" later and we're havin a smack down for the ages.

I shoulda known.

I always got cocky, I still get cocky. Just now I'm a little more aware. I wasn't back then. Never even realised something was wrong when Ryouga's punches stopped hurtin, or when the world got turned fuzzy…

Woke up a few minutes later and eleven ears younger than I shoulda been. Tied to a chair, locked as a girl, a burn on my back, sportin a bowl cut, surrounded by arcane lights and a little black pig chewing mercilessly at my ropes. Told the damn thing to leave. It wouldn't.

The bastard.

Pissed me off thinking that all the bad things I'd ever thought about him were wrong. But I'm glad. He was a friend and a protector. The only one I had for a while.

In between the dark room and the lights I made out a few people. Mousse for one. Principal Kuno, Kodachi, think I may have even seen the members of the science club. Can't really be sure. Don't even really care. I can't go back. Ain't never gonna see my old home... and even if I do it ain't gonna be my old home for long.

Cause I'd stain it RED.

RED like blood red hair I got on my head.

RED like the echings on my gun.

RED like my name.

Benihime.

Crimson Princess.

No…

I wouldn't do that. Not really anyway. I want to, but I won't. It's the beer talking. I've been drinking for a while now. I heard it's supposed to help with depression, but all it does is add fuel to the fire. I wanna go out and kill something. Not shoot, KILL. I want them to suffer. I want them to die. She didn't deserve that. She didn't do nothin to nobody. She didn't deserve-

"BENI! RANMA! GODDAMMIT OPEN THE DOOR!"

That'd be Nodachi, Ryouga. Just like me he's the best at what he does. Unbeatable team the two of us. Good for our enemies that we don't get together often enough. He's the champion swordslinger of Edo, and I'm the badass bitch from the Victoria States. Ain't no way we'll ever get beat. Better chance of me gettin sober sometime soon.

"RANMA! IF THIS DOOR ISN'T OPEN IN THE NEXT FIVE SECONDS I'M BREAKING IT DOWN!"

It's a damn good thing I live in my own flat. His voice is enough to wake the dead.

"FIVE."

Wow he's actually counting down.

"FOUR."

Thought he would just wait it out-

"THREE."

- and break the door down after.

"TWO."

Screw it.

"ONE!"

I couldn't walk a straight line if I tried.

**SMASH!**

The door is blasted open. Funny. I thought he would shatter it, or knock it off its hinges, just breaking the lock? Must be worried.

"Ranma…"

Yep he's worried. It's in his voice. The kind of voice he saved for Akane back in the day. If I was anybody but me, I might look into it. But I am me, and right now I don't give a crap.

I take another swig from the bottle. It's the hard stuff. The kinda stuff that'll blow the hell up if you rub on it too hard… Kinda makes me wonder why I can still think in complete sentences.

I hear him sigh.

"Ranma."

The years have been good to him. Unlike me he wasn't turned into a kid, or locked in his curse form, or given the Ultimate Weakness Moxibustion… He was just sent here. To this world, and he grew just like he should have. He's twenty-four right now, and a damn fine looker. If I was into guys I would be gunnin for him. I'm not though. I'm still into girls, even if it is weird now that I'm a permanent girl myself.

Stupid curse.

"I thought you got over that…"

I said that out loud? Damn. Can't even keep my thoughts internal anymore.

"Ranma, this isn't the answer-"

"The answer?" I cut him off, "Darlin I ain't lookin for an answer."

"Then what _are _you looking for Ranma."

I tilt the bottle up once again, liquid fire running through my veins. My head throbs, my vision blurs and I know the hangover that'll follow will be brutal. I love every second of it.

"A reason."

And the deepest black engulfs me…

I dream about her. It isn't the first time.

Susan…

My second friend. The reason I still have faith in people and the woman I loved unconditionally for six years. I met her as Ryouga's little sister. She was eight, smart for her age, and the first person to accept me without complaint. I grew up with her. Took care of the ranch, did what I could even in my weakened state and taught her to fend for herself. In return she was there for me when Ryouga got lost, comforted me when I fell into depression, listened to my stories and taught me a new way to fight.

I was eleven when I realised I was in love with her. I kept it secret for two more years after. In that time I had already begun making a name for myself.

Benihime.

My name was my proof. My title, and in a world where power meant everything, it was one of the three things I knew I could count on. I never killed anyone. I may have shot that gun off one to many times, but I never killed. Susan admired me for it. When the moxibustion point weakened a bit I started using bigger guns. Susan's gift for my thirteenth birthday was a .357 single action revolver. I called it my partner.

Sakurahana.

A name as beautiful as the one who gave it to me. I told her I loved her then. Blurted it out without thinking. She smiled at me, and told me she knew, but she wasn't like that… It hurt, more than anything I've ever felt.

But I loved her, so I never showed her my tears.

Not when I caught her and her boyfriend in a lip-lock in the barn. Or when I heard them making love. Not even when she cried as he broke her heart and begged me not to hurt him…

She never saw my tears, but God did I cry.

We left for City Side after her father died… the one time when I wasn't fast enough… I blamed myself… She didn't.

We had a good thing going for a while. I worked as an enforcer for "The Church". She became a photographer, a damn good one. I was the best, a slinger among slingers, and when Ryouga found me we were the unstoppable force with no immovable object in sight. It worked like that for a few months, then Susan got herself another guy.

It was hell on my heart.

Every night she came back smiling, being love has that effect. I'll admit I was jealous, but I loved her, so I supported her. That was until I caught the poor bastard chatting up some other girl and when chatting became lip-lockin; I lost it.

They never did find out who put all those bits of plastic into his legs.

Susan knew. She didn't talk to me for weeks afterwards. Even when she knew why I did it. When she did talk to me it was to say that it was her mistake to make, I didn't agree. We argued, and she called me some things… She left for a friend's and didn't come back until two days later.

Love is one hell of a thing. It makes us do things we wouldn't do otherwise… I can actually understand guys like Mousse and Gosunkugi now. It doesn't matter how badly the object of your affection treats you, or even if they don't know you're there. Just being close to them makes life worth living. Only difference between me and them, they were obsessed, I was in love. I could let Susan go… even though it killed a part of me…

I'll always remember those two days. Lonely dark days. There was nothing good about those days. The sun didn't shine, life didn't move forward, everything came to a screeching halt… and then she came back.

I remember answering the door, clad in little more than my underwear. (I had no feminine modesty in Nerima, and eight years of growing as a girl did little to change that.) It was Susan, and she was crying. Broke my heart to see her cry, but I stayed strong, because that's what I did. I did what she needed me too. I don't recall exactly what led to it, but I do recall when she kissed me.

She had the scent of angels on her. Pure and innocent. There was no evil with her around, and in her body I got lost.

I screamed her name, she moaned mine. She made me touch heaven, I returned the favour. Her touch, her taste, I'll remember it all forever and eternally.

I loved her, and I would support her.

Even if she had told me that it was a mistake, even if she had told me that I had taken advantage of her weak moment; I would love her.

She didn't say either of those things in the morning. She told me she loved me. Told me that as long as I accepted her she'd stay. I cried then. Tears of joy…stupid cliché... And for a month it was heaven.

But life ain't heaven. And in life shit has a way of hittin the fan. Susan didn't deserve what she got. She deserved to die old and feisty. Friends and family gathered around, and with me by her side, still young as ever, smiling down at her…

What they did to her…

How she screamed for me…

I saw the tapes. I saw how she died. I saw what they did and I took names. I took faces. I memorised everything about them, because I was going to kill them… I was… but… could I really do this? I killed protecting Akane, but could I kill for someone who was already dead? Could I just throw away all those years of martial arts discipline for my hate?

I hated doubting myself.

So I turned to the bottle. One reason. One reason not to hunt them down. To find out why, and to stick with plastic and not convert to lead…

I still haven't found my reason. And for them that's bad. I've never settled on being good at anything. I've never settled at being great either. I have to be the best, and I'm the best gunslinger in Gaia.

I've already made up my mind. I'm going to kill them. I'm going to condemn my soul to hell. I'm going to give up that one moral I refused to break. I'm going to stain myself RED with their blood…

Why?

Because she worth it.

Now all I gotta do is wake up…

Wake up damn you…

*~*~*~*~*

Please read and review.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N**

Wow… Never really expected such a response. Thanks for the reviews. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

I actually re-read the story not too long ago and was surprised that I actually liked what I wrote. I usually hate what I write.

Anyway, thanks again and I hope to continue to please.

**NOTE**

This story is just chock full of surprises and even though it's my own universe, it relates to other universes and will reconnect to the Ranmaverse as well as others.

*~*~*~*~*

_Benihime_

*~*~*~*~*

Oh Susanna

2

*~*~*~*~*

I wake up.

Slowly- Painfully-

The fog of my drunken stupor is gone, lifted, replaced by the sonofabitch who's tryin to sledgehammer his way outta my skull.

Hurts like hell…

I deserve the pain…

I can think now. Don't really know if that's a good thing or not. I'm doubting myself again.

Kill them or not?

Honour or vengeance?

Morality or… whatever the hell is the opposite of morality?

Just because I can think doesn't mean I can do it properly… The headache is killing me…

Damn hangovers.

I open my eyes. The place is dark. I can barely make out the flower shaped-clock on the dresser table. I'm in my room. In my bed. The same bed that Susan and I made love in…

God it hurts…

The tears are ready to fall. Hot and heavy. I can fell my body tense, trying desperately to suppress the shudders…

It comes to me then that I ain't got to be strong anymore. I don't have to hide my sadness… Susan is gone… I ain't got no reason to be strong…

I cry…

Pain, anguish, I let it all out. The bed is heavy with her scent… Our scent… More tears… I don't cry silently.

I wail. I scream. I sob.

I don't know how long I spend there. I don't even care. I only stop when my eyes can't water anymore and my throat is too sore to shout

I doesn't stop the shudders though. They stay… Calming down doesn't come easily to me, but in the end, as much as I don't want it to, it comes…

I breathe, slow and calculated. Just like Ryouga taught me. It helps, but not by much. I try to focus on other things, but the ghost of Susan haunts me. Close my eyes and she's there.

_The scent of angels._

I move to get up – and regret it instantly. Heartache may dull my hangover, but it's still there…

The sonofabitch just upgraded to a jackhammer.

I swear under my breath.

No. I shouldn't swear.

Susan hates it when I swear…

But Susan isn't alive anymore… and you're going to kill everyone who ever hurt her.

Susan…

The hell with this.

I sit up, ignoring the sonofabitch who seems to have called up a few friends. Now that I'm up I realise that several things just don't fit.

For one, I got drunk on the couch.

Two, I don't usually close my shades.

Three, where the hell is my gun?!

No one touches Sakurahana! Not even Ryou-

Oh yeah… Ryouga checked up on me last night… He probably took me here. Even laid me on my side to make sure I didn't hurt my tails. Wonder how long it took him to find the room? Gonna have to thank him after I kick his ass for touching my gun.

I stagger to the shower, Lord knows I need one, and take some time to throw up while I'm at it. The cold water hits me like a freight train. I stifle a gasp. The water is ice. Exactly what I need.

Coherence, never thought I knew big words like that, comes slowly. I'm making sense of things now. Ryouga's probably been here all night, or day… Gotta check the time… Damn him for being so concerned.

It takes a while, but I realise that I'm still dressed in what I wore last night. An oversized T-shirt and pink panties… Apparently it's my colour, or so Susan used to tell me.

Depression hits like a wave.

It still hasn't sunk in yet. I'll never see her again. Ever. I'll never hear that saccharine sweet voice, see that beautiful face or smell that lovely scent.

_The scent of angels._

I lower my head, and bite my tongue.

I will not cry.

Not again.

I swear I won't. Not until this is over. Not until I really decide what I'm doing. It's one thing to say something when you're drunk. It's another thing entirely to mean it.

I breathe out a sigh. Disgust? Relief? I'm not sure. I don't know anything anymore… I clean myself off in the cold water, and then change to hot. I used to hope that one day I'd change forms, that the lock would come off. I stopped hoping years ago. I'm too used to this form now… far too comfortable with my womanhood… I'm a tomboy, I know, but to the women of the Victoria states I was the embodiment of what they should become. Strong and independent. I didn't need a man to survive. I ruled my own world, and up till now I was doing a petty damn good job.

I sigh again.

It's about an hour before I get out of the shower. The headache is reduced to a dull throb. I'm thinking almost completely like myself right now. Ryouga would probably joke about how much smarter I was when I was drunk. I think he'd be right.

I step out of the shower and dress. Chest bindings, plain black panties, sleeveless red shirt, black pants, oversized brown leather jacket, gunmetal boots, gun belt and Sakur-

Damn.

Ryouga still has my gun. I shake my head to clear the cobwebs… God I need a drink. I reach into my dresser draw and pull out a flask, a small container of pills falls with it, white raindrops upon black tiles.

I'll be the first to admit that I got problems. I'll also be the first to admit some of em are my own fault. The pills ain't one of em. Personally I blame everyone in Nerima and their damn need to inflict head-injuries.

They just never got that they was bound to knock something loose sometime.

I was twelve when I first started to see things. Doctors in the Victoria States thought it was mental, gave me the pills. They helped, but taking the things always made me feel weak, like if I wasn't even strong enough to keep my head how was I supposed to help anyone else. It's still like that. I only take them when it gets bad. I ain't been bad in while.

I pick them up and out them in my pocket, sadly I also take a look at myself in the mirror. I look like hell. Even for a nekomata I look bad. Just another thing that's wrong with me, but this time I know its all pop's fault. Damn nekoken. It started about two years aback. My human ears shrank and the cat ears grew on top of my skull, and I grew a tail. A couple months later one tail split in two. Scared the crap outta me. Still does when I'm not prepared.

A couple swigs of my flask usually helps. I take some…

Works like a charm.

Ryouga's there, in my living room, eyes closed, sitting on his heels, sword in front of him. My gun is nowhere in sight.

"Give it back." I say dangerously.

"On the kitchen table right next to the food."

I check, it's there. Sakurahana feels warm and comforting at my side. She purrs appreciatively, I purr back.

"You should eat," Ryouga calls.

"I ain't in the mood for breakfast darling" I respond.

The few gulps of rotgut are enough to tie me over.

"Good cause it's lunch."

I pause at that. Damn… I say that a lot don't I?

I eat. Only cause I have to. Food just doesn't have the same taste anymore.

Susan…

Yeah… Everything comes back to Susan… Why…? Why was it her…?

"Ranma…"

It's his worried tone again. Damn, I hate that tone. No one should worry about me. I'm supposed to be the strong one. I'm supposed to be the one who worries about others… It ain't fair that the roles are reversed here. I take another swig from my flask, or at least I try too. Apparently someone cut the thing in two when I wasn't looking. I watch as my alcohol splashes and pools around my plate.

"Better have a good reason why ya did that darling, or I'm gonna have to start pullin teeth."

Ryouga sheathes his blade silently.

"Drinking doesn't solve anything."

I scoff.

"Ranma -"

Worried tone again.

"All you've done for the last few weeks is stay home and drink. I've seen the bottles. Hell I threw away most of them. You can't go on like this."

He's right. I know. But consciousness has a way of leading me back to her memory-

Susan…

- and the drink just happens to make it hurt less… Pathetic isn't it… Like I said I'll be the first to admit.

"I saw the tape."

My heart skips a beat. No one was supposed to know about the tapes. I paid a shitload of cash to make sure they never reached the public. If someone screwed me over I'll-

"You kept it in the machine." He responds to my murderous glare.

That calms me for the moment.

"What are you going to do?"

"What would you do in my position?"

He doesn't answer. And I know why. He'd do the very thing I'm contemplating, damned be the consequences.

"You can't do that Ranma."

"THE HELL I CAN"T!"

I can almost feel the fur on my ears and tail rise in anticipation of a fight. He looks at me with pity. I hate pity. Even more than I hate that concerned tone. I take a calming breath.

"So tell me P-chan, exactly how long did it take you to find my house? Better yet how long did it take you to find the kitchen once you were there."

He growls something under his breath. I pounce like the cat I've become.

"That long huh? I'd a thought a pig woulda been able to find food when he needed it."

His growl becomes louder.

"Bt then again you're a different kind a pig altogether ain't you. You're the kinda pig that sneaks into an innocent girl's room to-"

The blade swings, my gun moves. A resounding clash echoes throughout the room, followed by a single gunshot. I've always known what buttons to press to piss Ryouga off. Near eight years later many of them haven't changed. I put my gun back in its holster. Ryouga re-sheathes his sword, gently wiping away a thin line of blood from the cut above his eye. As usual I've won.

"What no 'Ranma prepare to die?'" I say.

"I've outgrown that." He replies.

The hell he has.

"I gotta see someone. You don't have to follow."

I leave.

Ryouga follows.

I'm glad.

I don't deserve him as a friend, but damned if I don't keep him that way…

Rain doesn't come often in City Side, and even when it does it's nothing more than a heated drop that's lucky to even hit the ground before it evaporates. But every once in a while, every once in a while it'll rain. Really rain. A downpour that renders all visibility useless. It coats and drenches and the streets become as empty as the bottles that line my bedroom floor.

I love it when it rains.

I don't need to see to know where I'm going. I know the roads. This city is my home, and when it rains, the city itself belongs to me. She calls for me, begs; and I respond with fervour. It doesn't matter to me that she's been ravaged by corruption. It doesn't matter to be that she's been violated by crime. All that matters to me is that she's there. Beautiful and willin, and waiting for me… only for me…

I reach where I wanna reach, drenched, but calmer than I've been in a long while.

I love the rain…

I stop, and take in the monster before me. City Side Holding. A maximum security prison, and home to the greatest scum that Gaia has to offer… and not all of em are in the cells, let me tell you. It's one of the reasons I can visit this place as often as I can. The guards know me, and they know I pay in cash.

"Ma'am?"

The guard stares at me, probably intrigued by the little black pig in my arms, or probably thinking how good I look waterlogged. Don't care really. He's as corrupt as they come. Hang around piece-of-shit cops long enough and you know their type.

"Cell Block F, 1549."

Right down to business. Don't let the bastard think I'm willin to pay more than I can give.

"I can't do that. That area is restricted. With the proper documentation I can-"

A small sack, no bigger than my palm falls at his feet. He checks it.

It's the proper documentation.

"I need to know if you're carrying any drugs or other restricted paraphernalia."

Another sack hits the ground.

I'm clean.

"Should I call an escort?"

"I can find my own way darlin."

And I do.

I need to see someone. Someone who's been a father to me since I came here. He's a killer… A murderer of the worst kind. Someone who hates injustices, and is willing to slaughter the ruling parties of City Side to get what he wants.

He was good at what he did.

Real Good.

They only caught him cause he mucked up. He killed someone who wasn't supposed to be killed. Someone innocent. He turned himself in the next day.

The old man's been on death row for four years now. They've been cold and hard on him. He smiles when he sees me. Sad when the only thing someone's got to look forward to is a visit from me.

"Hime. Good ter see ya."

His voice is course and raspy, like sandpaper on cardboard. To me it's bloody music. Testament to how bad I need to talk to someone.

"I need some advice darling, and you're the only one who can give it to me."

"Sure thing. What do ya need?"

I'm gonna tell him. I'm gonna tell him everything, and a little black pig's gonna be my witness. Ryouga can't help me. He ain't been there. This guy has. I'm leavin him to make the decision for me…

God save those sorry bastards if he gives me the answer I want to hear.

*~*~*~*~*

Please read and Review


End file.
